Saving My Life

Luke 9:24 says, "For whosoever will save his life shall lose it: but whosoever will lose his life for my sake, the same shall save it." Over the years I've struggled with this verse. How can I apply it to my life so that it changes me? That is after all the point of faith - to change one's life for the better.

Tonight as I was reading this verse again and thinking about all the new things I am starting in my life right now, I had one of those ah-ha moments. I have dreams and aspirations, but purposefully chasing them requires that I change who I am right at this moment. I've started a new business and gone back to school. All of which require me to do things that push me out of my comfort zone. I could save who I am right now, but I will lose out on who I am in terms of my own potential. I could also let go of who I am, work through the discomfort of living outside my comfort zone and emerge on the other side myself, but only better.

The same is true as I strive to become more like Christ. I cannot hold onto my habits, thought processes and attitudes that I have used all my life and hope to become a "new creature." But, if I dare to let go of my old self the sky's the limit to how much better I can be. And I can save myself!

Success and Failure

Success and failure are woven together as a single fabric. Teddy Roosevelt once said, "Far better is it to dare mighty things, to win glorius triumphs, even though checkered by failure... than to rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy nor suffer much, because they live in a gray twilight that knows not victory nor defeat." Success cannot be gained without traversing the pain of failure. It is only separated from defeat by the ability to learn from the past and lift one's self from the dust and make another attempt. As I journey through my own personal wilderness, I must be the scholar learning from the rubble that is my past defeats and continue on to the one day when I will again lift the trophy high in victory!

My Oasis

I know that not every day is easy . . . know that trials and difficulties are part of life. But lately it seems I have been journeying through a personal and spiritual wilderness. Life feels dry, harsh and barren. The harder I try to move forward, the farther backwards I seem to fall. And the joy I usually find in life has evaporated in the heat of the day. In the midst of the heat and the struggle and the dryness, the wind begins to whip around; the sand swirls into a blinding storm of stress.

As I move through my desert, I try to look for the lessons in the desert, but find I struggle to keep my eyes on the truth that is greater than this single moment in time. Now I find myself in need of an oasis. Not to hide from the challenges and fears I face, but a place that restores my soul. Through the sand storm, I am finding I have the power to create my own oasis and am learning contentment in all things.

(Photo Source: best.berkeley.edu)

Loving Myself

Ever since I was a child, I have know that I was to love my neighbor as myself. Yet somehow in the midst of focusing on loving my neighbor near and far, I somehow missed the other half of the principal. Before I can love anyone else I have to love me!



I am created in God's image. That means God gave me what I need to succeed, that I have strength and abilities that even I don't know I have. I have to remember that I am but flesh and despite my best attempts, I will fall. And even when I fall, I can find redemption, forgiveness and the strength to continue striving. I must celebrate the good and look for the root cause of that which I wish to change. Critcizing every fault I see in me will not change who I am.



I love you, Me!

Grain of Mustard Seed

This fall, my son's class completed a unit on fire safety. Something about the way the information was presented created a very deep fear in him. He was fearful at bedtime, unsure of what would happen if a fire broke out in our home while he slept. He didn't want to take a shower because he might be trapped if the house caught on fire while he slept.

As I struggled to figure out how I could help him through this very difficult time, I remembered him earlier asking me what the Bible meant when it said, "If ye have faith as a grain of mustard seed, ye shall say unto this mountain, Remove hence to yonder place; and it shall remove ; and nothing shall be impossible unto you." (Matthew 17:20). How could he or any person for that matter, move a mountain? We live in the Pacific Northwest. He knows how big mountains are.

When I picked my son up from school that day, we talked about mountains and mustard seeds. I explained how his fear was his mountain and how small mustard seed was and how that was all the faith it would take to move that mountain of fear.

Together that day as we drove to the baby sitter's, we claimed that promise! Today that mountain is barely a mole-hill and my son's faith has grown as he learned the power of a mustard seed!

Picture courtesy of http://cacina.wordpress.com/2009/08/08/carry-the-gospel-with-you-249/

A Child's Wisdom

The other night, my seven year-old son came to me and said, "Mommy, I don't care what the kids in my class say, I have the dignity to eat peas!" For him, the playground dynamics had been standing between him and enjoying a vegetable he loved.

That night as we enjoyed peas with our dinner, I wondered how many times I like the dignity and respect for myself to stand up for what I believe in the face of my peers opinions. How many times have I given up on something because those around me said it wasn't possible or worth the effort. Or how many times have I looked at a problem only at the surface level and failed to understand the relational structure and dynamics of the situation, leaving myself a prisoner of the situation? How many times have I lacked the dignity to eat peas?

Picture courtesy of http://www.retirement-today.co.uk/images/peas1.jpg

Perfection

Would that I could
Would that I be
All that the I Am
Would have me to be.
Established in faith,
Holding to the hope
That through all my trials
Perfected I'll be.